I want; I desire

Sitting here and reflecting on my 5 beautiful children, and the honor and privilege I have at being "their mom", there are some things that I so desire and want for them.

Obviously the top priority is their salvation and ETERNAL life, and YES I am assured of that. All 5 of them!!!! I desire for them to be happy and healthy in life, to love what they do, and do what they love. To always feel loved by me, their dad, each other, and their future spouses. To always know their identity in Christ, and the person that God created them to be. (so glad I get to help them on this part of their journey). For them to see themselves and abilities the way God sees them. What CONFIDENCE they will hold with that!

For them to remain close and bonded with each other and their family. To be there for each other through the journey of life. To build on their own special relationships with each other, and then with each other's families. To be those FAVORITE Uncles and an Aunt. Of course, she will lovingly share her Aunt role with her brother's wives, and they will gladly accept her prince of a husband! For their children to be so close with each other and their cousins. Yes...just the way it should be!

So yeah, among all of the other things I "may want"....THIS IS THE BEST!!!

I LOVE YOU Brandon, Jordan, Seth, Jedidiah & Desi!

It was FUN***

Changes & More Of The Same

The wrap up of summer ended with a fun camping trip to Chincoteague. It was so much fun spending time with family, seeing the wild ponies, eating roasted marshmallows, being outside...& just chillin!

Then it was the start of new seasons...Seth started his junior year in High School...yes I cried (I always do the first day)
Jordan left for California (cried too ~ but soooo happy for him), "helper boy" started Pre-K, and the "Princess" started with her toddler class.



As seasons change, it can be so hard for me to move into them. Both naturally, and the seasons of life. I am trying to enjoy each moment (thought I would have learned by now), and embrace the change. Expected and Unexpected. Trying to be STILL in the moment that God has me in. Trusting, pressing in, & like Brandon...NEVER GIVING UP. Sometimes I "get it"...most times, I don't. But non-the-less...I KNOW I am called to keep going, keep reaching for it, and always always always...Trusting and Loving the one who Loves me Most...after all...I am HIS FAVORITE! :-)

Beautiful!!!!

Beautiful One Conference!!! ♥.....thank you to my Mighty Man of God Steve for taking on the business of our home, especially with the two littles, for honoring me with this time, and for learning to do a little girls hair! You are awesome & I LOVE LOVE LOVE You!
My family is good!

Blizzard...I'll take mine from Dairy Queen next time!

Well....the 2 back to back Blizzards we have had have eased up on some of my "funk"...although there were many times during the cabin fever frenzy that my mind would take a walk down memory lane....sometimes that can be good, but a lot of times the good is followed by that intense longing. I would suppose that is the way God longs for us. Time, relationship, fellowship, our love.

When I think about it that way, it gives me a fresh breath and the shear full happiness that because of what God did for me through his son Jesus..I WILL see Brandon again one day. And he did the same for Steve, Jordan, Seth, Little Helper Boy & Little Mama....and all of the other family and friends I LOVE SO MUCH!

Thank you God for always being there to lift my eyes and wipe my tears.

Summer Weekend

Friday, was just one of those favorite July days of mine....very warm and humid. My only thing with humid days (cause I won't complain) is my hair......becomes VERY curly and frizzy. But oh well....I will pay that price. (SMILE)

Friday night Steve and I had steamed shrimp and other goodies outside on the patio (I LOVE to eat outside), Seth was away as usual to his "other home" ~ friends....and Jordan and his friend Keith joined us for the yummy outside dinner. It was fun catching up with Keith, and the laughing and talking around the table is always fun.



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Saturday...my kind of day again..although the humidity had subsided some, it was a perfect reading on the deck by the pool afternoon. AND the water in pool was just right! Later that night Steve, Seth, and my self joined my in-laws for a LOOOOOOONG...but FUN Shorebirds Baseball Game. Of course the stadium food, and fireworks (YOU KNOW I LOVE MY FIREWORKS) at the end were the best thing about the night along with good company. Another FUN summer night

Church on Sunday = AWESOME, 2 parties and hanging out with a lot of people I LOVE, and long into the evening visits outside. Summer is where my heart is.

It always has been, and at one time I thought that would be gone forever. Summer is my most FAVORITE time of the year, but is also falls into the most difficult time of our lives. 5 years ago during this time, we were desperately begging, praying, clinging, and hoping for the earthly life of our precious Brandon. I always felt like it was another cruel injustice that I had to have my son pass away during what was such a favorite time of mine and our family. But each year gets better, and God has continued to show up and heal our hearts. And I can say now....my son got to transition from his earthly home, onto his ETERNAL HOME and look upon the face of his Saviour...during our favorite time. He is just waiting for us now. Don't get me wrong....I still have "those days", and really wish things were different. But God, family & friends have helped us on this road that we continue to travel. And I can also say....my LOVE of Summer has been returned, and I really like to think that when it is my day, and Brandon and Jesus are there to meet me, SUMMER will be a little piece of MY Heaven, but with GOOD HAIR DAYS! :-o
THANK YOU GOD!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

Psalm 34:18 ~ The Message
If your heart is broken, you'll find God right there; if you're kicked in the gut, he'll help you catch your breath

BEAUTIFUL & FUN weekend

There is just so much to be smiling about :-)!!!

First, Steve & I are praying intently on what is in this envelope, and about to jump in with both feet! God has confirmed so many times, that I think he may be wanting to say..."Dawn...just how many times do you want me to confirm this already "! But he is so gentle and so patient, and his timing is the correct timing! Yaaay for that!

Second...Steve & I had a personal "Sozo" ~ greek ~ restore, to make whole, heal. And WOW...God really did some MAJOR work on me! And showed me some things, and confirmed others (one had to do with the envelope), and he also just showed me just how much he loves me. And seriously....anyone and everyone who reads this...I WANT THAT FOR YOU & SO DOES GOD! :-)

More stuff....my neice Brooke had her senior prom...so of course you know what that means...LOTS of pictures! This is my Brookie Cookie, who by the way was also crowned PROM QUEEN!Cousins, Brooke & MY SETH!


Then while taking Seth to a friends (that boy never stays home) we got to take the Chevelle out and DRIVE IT FAST! Oh YEAH! So much FUN


And then the weekend was capped of on Sunday with AWESOME PRAISE & WORSHIP ~ that my Seth was playing the drums on, and then a wonderful Bridal Brunch for my sister Katie who is getting married in June. It was so much fun getting to spend time with all of my sisters (Susan,Katie, & Linda) family, and celebrate my sister Katie
(she was the flower girl at my wedding) I just love her so much

So all in all....GREAT weekend and GREAT weather...for those who know me, you know I LOVE LOVE LOVE the hot weather! :-O. And we are on the countdown for when Jordan comes home from Seattle...just about 5 weeks!

Happy Daughter of the KING, Happy Mom, Happy Aunt, Happy Sister, Happy Wife = HAPPY LIFE

Jordan is almost HOME!!!

My baby is on his way..........he is in the air over our beautful country, and soon to be back in his momma's arms!!!!!!!

Thank you again God for my family! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!

Roller Coaster ~ What's your ride?

That pretty much sums up the feelings that go on in this life of mine. Although it is a life I LOVE so much......there are the obvious that I would change.....BRANDON HERE instead of waiting for us in Heaven, more consistency in my life, more discipline with my precious time with God (I LOVE him so much for his Patience with me), and to ALWAYS keep that ETERNAL VIEW!

But even with all that said...I still have no real regrets. There are many people I can thank for that. First my Sweet husband Steve....I thank him that I have never had to work full time. That we were always in agreement with me being home with the kids. And all of those memories of them are so priceless. Especially in the here and now. 100 years would have never been enough with Brandon here on this earth, but the times we did have are irreplaceable! And being with Jordan and Seth still is so special to me. Even though they are at an age where they don't "need" me so much, but I'd like to think that they "want" me there (smile). And my mom for teaching me just how to LOVE my children, my sister for being my BEST friend, and my brother for letting me work for him but still be "bossy" with him (laugh), and all of my family and friends for always being there for me!

Emotions are so funny and perplexing....I have been in a struggle in the past few days. A little bit like one of the lyrics in that first song on my playlist that I can DEFINITELY relate to at times........"I have no fear of drowning, it's the breathing that's taking all this work". I have been missing Brandon, missing Jordan, and missing the "young" Seth. Missing all 3 of their baby times. Realizing that unless it is a vacation or summer break...Jordan will no longer really live full time with us. That can make me cry, even though I am so proud of him and know that this is a normal step. But still, it makes my heart sad.

And then there is today.....I am full of anticipation. Excitement for what is to come in my life. SUPER EXCITED that on the 18th we will be picking up Jordan from the airport and then head to Disney. I so can't wait to HUG & BUG him (smile)! Eager anticipation on what God has in store for me individually, for me and Steve together, and for his plans and purposes in my children's lives. I am so glad that God is LARGE and IN CHARGE......that he gave me my family, that he knows me from the inside out, that he knows the end from the beginning, and that through it all......HE WILL NEVER LEAVE ME!

I LOVE YOU GOD!